“It was impossible to get a conversation going; everybody was talking too much.” -Yogi Berra
Yet another really worthwhile thing that doesn’t cost a penny- conversation.
Next time you want to go out and do something with your friends, skip the movie. Movies are not only way overpriced, but they stifle any chance of having a deep conversation. With email, IM, Facebook, MySpace, texting, etc etc, real face to face conversations are becoming a rarity. I’m not talking about the mandatory, “Hey, how’s it going?” “Fine, you?” “Good.” “See ya.” Sure, we have those all the time. A lot of people spend a fair amount of time chatting, too. But what I’m suggesting are deep, personal, engaging conversations. When you have one of these, you’ll know it. It will change you somehow. You’ll learn something new about the person. You might feel closer to them afterward. And if you listen as much as you talk, you might learn something about yourself, too.
Go for a walk, or sit in the kitchen, or rendezvous at some favorite spot. Personally, I think a good bonfire is always an excellent place for deep conversations. There’s something about staring into a huge fire that makes me want to delve into the deep recesses of my life and share it with someone.
The art of good question asking is the key to success in conversations. Don’t be afraid to ask somewhat prying questions. Everyone loves to talk about themselves. Why else would people throw away thousands of dollars a year on therapists who listen to them spill their guts? Unless your problems are really dire, you probably don’t really need a therapist, just a good friend. Save the dough, spill it for free.