Squirrel Melts?

WARNING: Vegetarians, PETA members, squirrel lovers, and people with weak stomachs probably should NOT watch this video. Not very graphic by today’s standards, but probably emotionally disturbing to some.

Ah, squirrel melts! “He’s kinda cute. Put his little tender butt in there.” We must surely acknowledge that the lady and the music make this video especially creepy.

Let’s examine the merits and pitfalls of squirrel consumption.

  • Pitfall- the heartbreak factor. Most people’s reflex when they see a furry little animal is to think that it’s cute. When I see a squirrel, I want to take it home with me and train it to ride around on my shoulder.
  • Pitfall- The socially ostracizing factor. In some circles, it may be considered a faux pas to eat squirrels. You might want to watch out for this if you’re a member of “high society”…or any society, for that matter. Your friends, relatives, and neighbors might start to view you as a hillbilly, redneck, freak, or creeper if they learn of your squirrelly diet.
  • Merit- the financial factor. Squirrel consumption could certainly be a money saver. They’re abundant, and apparently quite easy to prepare. All you need is the right kind of gun- a one time investment for a long term profit. You know what they say- give a man a fish and he has food for a day. Teach a man to fish and he has food for life.
  • Merit- the dietary doctrinal consistency factor. If you eat animals, you probably shouldn’t pick and choose which animals you eat, except based on taste preference and health reasons. Have you ever hung around with a chicken? They can be pretty darn cute. So why does Henrietta get eaten and not Nutty? If you don’t eat animals, I respect your opinion and admire your strength. If it’s animal rights you’re worried about, isn’t this about as good as it can get? The squirrels don’t live a bad life. They’re not penned up with a bunch of other squirrels, suffering in cramped conditions to be mass-slaughtered for commercial meat packing plants. They get to live out their lives roaming free and blissfully unaware of the danger until POP! and it quickly comes to an end.

Personally, I could never hunt. I love animals, and couldn’t kill one directly unless my life depended on it. I’ll never understand the “sport” of it. But I do come from a family of hunters. I grew up on venison burgers and deer jerky from the prizes my opa, dad, and brother brought home. I believe in conservation. No one should kill an animal and waste it. I believe in humane treatment. Buying locally, buying free range, or hunting your own food are good ways to avoid supporting animal cruelty. But I can’t quite bring myself to believe that eating animals is bad in and of itself.

So go ahead, save a few bucks. Have a squirrel melt.

About Nicole

Daughter of God, wife, mother, volunteer youth leader, substitute teacher, aspiring writer, rabbit owner, nature lover. These are some of my titles.
This entry was posted in Nature, Random News and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

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