Mass Pandemonium in Melbourne

“It was disgusting, these young lads were urinating in my fish pond, and kicking over my gnomes. I have never seen anything like it, I have lived here for 28 years, and my gnomes have never been attacked like this before.” -Sheila Outrigger, Melbourne

“They beheaded five of my gnomes and knocked over my brand-new bird bath. It’s a disgrace, they have no respect for others and I blame, as always, the parents.” -Lucinda R, Melbourne

I love the BBC. This story is a must-read!

Apparently a bunch of Catholic boys from Xavier in Melbourne, Australia thought it’d be a great idea to don their school ties as g-strings and run about town blowing up fireworks and terrorizing the neighborhood. The folks at Xavier were not amused. It’s tradition for the graduating class to have a “muck-up” day, but the school thought they mucked this one up just a wee bit too much.

Their punishment? Xavier cancelled classes until the final day. Sounds like a victory to me, boys.

Perhaps even more amusing than the story itself are the posted responses on BBC’s website. I don’t know if the first one I quoted is legit- is there seriously a Sheila Outrigger in Melbourne complaining about “these young lads”? I sure hope so, because that’s just priceless.

The responses varied from “Why don’t we beat our children anymore?” to “Nice work boys! You make us proud.”

Maybe we need to look at the deeper issues. Are the parents to blame? Is the school tradition of muck-up day to blame? Are the students to blame? Does everyone need to get their underwear out of a bundle and have a good laugh over this? On second thought, forget the deeper issues. Ponder them if you will, but I for one choose to take the story just as it is. Lock up your gnomes, ladies.


About Nicole

Daughter of God, wife, mother, volunteer youth leader, substitute teacher, aspiring writer, rabbit owner, nature lover. These are some of my titles.
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3 Responses to Mass Pandemonium in Melbourne

  1. Nicole says:

    I guess this could be an economy story. BBC says average yearly tuition for Xavier is $16,000 (Australian), about $11,000 (US), or £6,500 (British).
    So, don’t go to/send your kids to Xavier if you want to save money or if you or your kids are planning on getting kicked out. However, running rampant in your hometown wearing a necktie g-string is one way to entertain yourself without spending a lot of money. Think about it… 😉

  2. Anonymous says:

    I love how the resident can’t believe they were drunk. Really? They are running around town in nothing but banana hammocks, annihilating helpless gnomes, and breaking each others legs on a playground. Thank God they were drunk. If they behaved this way sober they’d have to be institutionalized. I bet they had a lot of fun though, and if they damaged anything their rich parents could fix it without them ever suffering any consequences.

  3. Nicole says:

    You’re right. If they were sober the headline would have been different. Maybe something like, Xavier students infected with mass psychosis. Then again, who knows? Some people are just very free. They had to have planned this in advance, and that might have occurred in a sober state. Maybe they just have a really strong lust for life…

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