Grace fall down

Today was great. Tonight is not.

I don’t know why I get this way. For someone so arrogant, I’m awfully insecure. I’m always afraid. I feel like I have no purpose. Things in my control slip away and things out of my control seem so big.

God is bigger. But I run from God. It’s my nature. I hide to see if God will find me. He knows where I am but he’s waiting for me to come out and listen. I’m too stubborn. Like a stupid mule, I need my bit and bridle.

I’m looking for security in all the wrong places. Even the greatest strongholds in life are weak. I can’t be perfect on my own. No one here can save me. I’m constantly disappointed in myself and in others. I need grace in the worst way. I feel wretched. I look at the world and myself and I am disgusted.

Everything is I and me, even in my humblest moments. God, save me from myself.

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About Nicole

Daughter of God, wife, mother, volunteer youth leader, substitute teacher, aspiring writer, rabbit owner, nature lover. These are some of my titles.
This entry was posted in Contentment, Life as we know it and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Grace fall down

  1. Nicole says:

    A thousand times I’ve failed, still your mercy remains. And should I stumble again, still I’m caught in your grace. Everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades. Never ending, your glory goes beyond all fame. My heart and my soul, I give you control. Consume me from the inside out, Lord. Let justice and praise become my embrace, to love you from the inside out. Your will above all else, still my purpose remains. The art of losing myself in bringing you praise. Everlasting, your light will shine when all else fades. Never ending, your glory goes beyond all fame. And the cry of my heart is to bring you praise. From the inside out, Lord, my soul cries out.

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